328 - The Vulnerability of Being Seen with Noelle McWard Aquino
“And so when I do anything public-facing, there's always this part of me that thinks, ‘Oh, I should be more… you know, dynamic, charismatic,’ like, you can fill in the word." ~ Noelle McWard Aquino
On self-promotion, authentic marketing, and finding your own way to be visible as a therapist.
Anxiety is as old as humankind. Maybe that’s why every person has a different definition of the uneasy state that derails our thoughts or actions.
Time to connect with an expert. Noelle McWard Aquino, LCSW, is a Chicago-based therapist and soon-to-be major TED Talk alum. She has three decades of experience supporting clients with anxiety and is the bestselling author of Anxiety Unpacked: Discover Your Type and Recover Your Peace.
“Anxiety is often just a completely appropriate, normal protective response to trauma,” Noelle begins. By reframing anxiety as something ordinary, she dilutes the stigma surrounding it. That shift also creates more space for curiosity and less need to “fix” a perceived personality flaw. “What I want to change is giving us different language that's a lot more precise, that actually describes what’s happening,” Noelle says.
Noelle identifies three distinct types of anxiety: catastrophizing, control, and distorted beliefs. She explains how a different need drives each type and pushes back in its own predictable way. I love her assessment because it aligns with what I learned in NARM: anxiety is often self-directed anger. In my experience, if I don't feel like I can be outwardly angry at a person or thing, I kinda turn it inward.
Performing is my release valve. Weird, I know, because putting yourself out there isn’t everyone’s idea of managing anxiety. Noelle is navigating this tension as her TED Talk is about to debut. “The thing that's most uncomfortable for me is anything that feels like self-promotion. I'm not somebody who loves being front and center.”
I think vulnerability has types or tiers, too. What feels like uncomfortable exposure for one person (Noelle) may be another person’s jam (me!). But we share the same desire: to be known in our authenticity and to feel safe doing so.
GUEST CONTACT & BIO
Noelle McWard Aquino, LCSW, is a therapist in Chicago with over 30 years experience specializing in the treatment of anxiety. She is the author of the bestselling book Anxiety Unpacked: Discover Your Type and Recover Your Peace, which offers a unique way to understand anxiety and what you can do about it.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Anxiety Unpacked: Discover Your Type and Recover Your Peace
The NeuroAffective Relational Model® - NARM®
RECOMMENDED EPISODES
Bear Hébert - How To Earn A Living Without Dying From Capitalism (Yes, Really!)
Join the waitlist for the next Authentic Leaders Group!
This is a journey of self-discovery and leadership mastery, where you'll not only enhance your leadership skills but also forge meaningful connections with fellow therapists who are committed to their own growth and the betterment of the therapy field. Apply now!
Thank you to The Therapist Network for sponsoring the show!
The Therapist Network is a global community built by and for therapists. You’ll find live consult groups, an ever-growing library of workshops and courses, plus a community that really sees you. Sarah’s group, Tending to the Wounded Healer, meets every other Monday from 1–2pm CT, and it’s a space to explore the intersection of your lived experience and your clinical work.
So if you want to feel more supported and less alone, visit TheTherapist.Network—or join Sarah’s group directly at tinyurl.com/HealerConsultTTN.
UPCOMING EVENTS
Check the calendar for opportunities to connect with Sarah and earn CEs.
SUPPORT THE SHOW
Join our Patreon for gifts & perks
Shop our Bookshop.org store and support local booksellers
Share a rating & review on Apple Podcasts
***
Let’s be friends! You can find me in the following places…